Every morning, Bobby travelled to school on his own, further inland to a town where the living conditions were rough.
Facing gangs were frequent and sometimes violent. Not necessarily deadly, but one probably would be paralysed or unable to do things for the rest of their lives. Death would've made things obvious and extreme, so maiming was much less punishing and easier to get away with. The education system back then were single gender. Males became overly violent, inconsiderate brutes with fierce competition. That obviously meant a lot of extreme Youth Crime between males and also towards females of other institutions. Public education was free which had a very interesting effect on the staff. They won't work harder than their salary and were ignorant or careless. They had no enthusiasm or patience to teach. One would definitely learn more just by reading the book.
Their purpose was about getting the next fat pay-cheque, not the student's future or welfare. There's no incentive.
Corporal punishment (that could leave scars) were allowed. Other punishments were prohibition to have lunch/food or not allowed to use the toilets. Strictly forced to study and get good grades else it's push-ups or getting whipped by a thin metal rod which left blue marks/bruises. It was torture and hard to even think about studying while worrying about avoiding the pain or punishment. Most of the people found it humorous and were totally fine with this. We should "take it like a man", type of attitude.
If we were to bleed from the strike and walk off silently like a tough guy, it's considered "badass". Using the wounds as triumph.
Bobby's parents were aware of the corporal punishments and helplessly wanted to get him into a better school or private one.
His parent's full dedication was to work so that their children can have better education. Kids grow fast and they were coping.
"Everyone goes through this same system, so Bobby should climb, just like the rest." That was society's reasoning for education.
While his parent's were trying their best to do something, he decided to also do his part and not just be a dead weight.
The boy was suffocating under a grasp of avoiding negativity and crime, while at the same time trying to focus on his studies and not letting his parents down. So the boy sometimes didn't tell them about certain incidents that happened or bruises he had.
Just to ease the struggle for his parents, he wanted to bring good news, not always talk about punishments and negativity because that affected the happiness they shared at home and he didn't want that. So he separated that energy like a shield.
The bad stuff that happens at school; stays in school. And the love at home; stays at home. One is to fight, the other is to rest.
Easier said than done being this young, he would skip classes to be at home. Although his parents refused this behaviour,
they sometimes did allow him to stay. But after an uplifting conversation, they were right, he had to get through that phase,
study hard and achieve greater goals or go to better schools. Bobby was too afraid to even be in that area.
Out of stubbornness he kept skipping classes and would spend time at shops that offered internet services where he eventually was apprehended by the police for Truancy (Uniform Codes were strict). His father retrieved him, disappointed, never angry.
He couldn't go to school due to crime, he couldn't stay at home because it's bad for his future and he couldn't also be online.
At that point although he was silent and compliant, he felt suicidal. The staff at schools were like soulless robots. "That's life", they say. They don't know what goes on behind their backs and even if they do, they ignore it until victims lose fingers or so, then act with the lowest sympathy and condolences while staring dead in the eyes. Bobby tolerated 3 years among the cold-blooded.
Realising he didn't have much option, he ran away again. There was nothing to look forward to. It wasn't worth it to him.
His mother would wonder why his clothes were so dirty, muddy or sometimes torn. As an excuse, Bobby said he had sports training (P.E). So he was then given spare clothes to wear. His schoolbag was also very light which made his parents suspect in comparison to other students that looked like turtles. He said he leaves the heavy books at school or lends it to friends for homework.
Which was the truth but, in reality, he was in the wild.
A renegade from everything, he ventured off to seek a bit of happiness. For many weeks he would explore the landscape away from civilisation. The freedom was bliss! He had an abundance of food, mainly delicious fruits such as mangoes, bananas and lychee. He would swim at the azure blue beach, trek down waterfalls, dash through gorges and hike mountains without any equipment or safety. He did this solo and was adventurous. No one was watching. The trees, also blind.
Bobby had a strange sensation... He was alone, but wasn't lonely. Even till today, he prefers to do things on his own.
Downpours felt invigorating, bird sounds were music. One of those days, he climbed to the very peak.
People would not be going up there, it's way too dangerous, so no one would find him and he would fear nothing anymore.
His heart was racing. No one really understood him. At the very top, he leaned over the edge, looked around and saw the Island from the heights. How tiny the houses, cars and people were. The clouds that rolled over the ranges were among him.
That day would've definitely been his last. Was this really what his destiny was about? To run? To fail? To give up?
He knew that a lot of the struggles his family was going through, was because of him.
They never showed or told him that, but he could feel the responsibility based on how hard they worked.
"What would make them happy as before?"
"Why is it so important to study and do all that crazy stuff?"
"Why do we need to be so strict about education that it seems like life is not worth living if we don't achieve higher studies?"
"I saw how worthless a Certificate was, people exploited my parents even though they were kind and worked hard."
"Why are many of the wealthy ones, the bad guys? If that's the case then why study to end up being a bad guy?"
"Is that what it's all about? Because I can do that right now. Just steal drugs from those bullies and resell it."
"What is my purpose? I don't know why i'm here. Work-Eat-Sleep cycle for the rest of my life for what? Nobody looks happy."
"I don't mind competition and being the best at what I do, but what is that thing exactly? Or is it just money and nothing else?"
"Would it be better for them if I simply didn't exist? I would just be with God, everyone says it's paradise so why not go there?"
"How am I supposed to have Peace in this chaos? Everyone out there is theoretically killing each other for their own gain."
Lots of "Whys".
There was a calming sensation that gently grew within Bobby. He also found a different, greater kind of sentiment for his family.
The boy's parents were an inspiration... He looked up to them and wanted to be who they were.
Hard to explain; Such an angelic liberty felt like broken shackles and a sudden gush of hope.
None of the thoughts, even added together, made it worth giving up what he had and bring sorrow onto his family.
For a moment, he paused and could sense no more pain in his heart, but an overpowering love. He was sincerely grateful.
Perhaps consider it meditation but he simply stayed up there for a few hours and heavily contemplated on life while eating packed-lunch (fried rice) prepared by his mother and munched on some fruits. Fearless on a mountain peak... Complete serenity.
Eventually, the boy stood up and admired the beauty of the skies gradually changing colours to purple.
He inhaled and sighed deeply then climbed down to return home...
The boy couldn't find a way to win, but losing was no longer an option.
